Saturday was my birthday and a reminder of why I do not celebrate my birthday. It started off well enough though. 
I woke up early and went for a nice ride to Palo Alto. This however is when I started to feel down and I have yet to shake it. When i was having breakfast with two good friends, I realized while they were friends in the truest sense I was alone. We began to talk about relationships and miscellaneous topics. There was discussion of this and that. Calls to significant others were made and taken to discuss impending events that night and plans that were already in place. The friends that accompanied me were expressing a sense of care towards someone else. I fell back into my rap of jovial jocularity to mask my discontent and pain in order to not ruin the morning. A slice of cake was delivered and the birthday song was sung but I felt a sense of regret that i had agreed to go along. I know that this was not what they meant to do and there was no sense in me feeling this mal-content but I was feeling alone in my self imposed solitude. The two accompanied me to see my pops where we indulged in some extravagant tailgating which is a standard for Stanford football fans. Again I see couples and people enjoying the day but I’m simply feeling down because of this. The people there are wonderful, as are the two that went with me to visit my pops. (more…)